In my role as Executive Director at Hope Resource Center, I am often asked, “What made you, a millennial male, get involved in the work of pregnancy centers?” I love answering this question because I long to see more of me serving in this capacity.
The dichotomy offered by the pro-life and pro-choice communities is an interesting one, as one side desires a man’s involvement while the other badgers and discourages any man from being involved at all.
This, of course, can be explained by one’s worldview. Not always, but typically those standing for life see men as leaders needing to be engaged and providing a voice for the vulnerable while those standing for choice see men as the problem or at the very least, a person needing to be silenced because they obviously hate women.
As a son to a woman, a husband to a woman, and a dad of two daughters, I find it comical when I am referred to as a hater of women. This could not be further from the truth. It is my love for women and, frankly, all of humanity that drives my work in the life-movement.
This is why I got involved at HOPE. I spent years in the political world seeking a change. I debated, argued, and attempted to convince many to change their views. This work was not fruitless, but if I am honest, it also didn’t come from a healthy place. My debating and arguing was more about winning and not seeing the others around me as actual people. I failed to recognize that people are greater than issues.
This is what God used to point me toward the work of pregnancy centers in our city. Conviction is a powerful motivator. I wanted to make a direct impact on my neighbors. I didn’t and haven’t disengaged from the political sphere, but I did shift my focus a bit.
It is clear to me that when men stay silent or become disengaged, the vulnerable are attacked. I realize that this is not a popular thought in 2017, but it was true in Genesis 3 with Adam’s disengagement and it is true today with our disengagement.
Adam stood by and ultimately participated in the eventual fall of mankind as his wife was targeted. Men tend to use this text as a blame-placer for women and the fall of mankind, but Eve fell because Adam refused to stand. He did exactly what today’s society would want him to do. He stayed silent, distant and destruction followed.
We continue to see this today as men refuse to speak out for the unborn and the vulnerable. We see patients every single day at HOPE struggling to decide on their next step. Our experiences and the data show us that many of these women facing unplanned pregnancies ultimately regard the father of the baby as the chief influencer on what choice they will make.
Applauding and encouraging men to stay silent hurts women, babies, and society. This damage is real and should not be neglected when we are having a conversation on life and abortion. This is why pro-lifers long to see more involvement from men. This is, ultimately, why I decided to get involved. Through the Lord’s convicting I saw my disengagement as what it really was – apathy.
Adam was apathetic in the Garden. He wasn’t living with intentionality seeking to protect and love his wife. It is easy for men to fall into this trap and remove themselves from responsibility. This gets easier when society and culture are seeking to silence us as well. We must go against the grain here. We must act and engage to protect and support the most vulnerable in our society.
I would love to see more of me in this work but I will say that many men have come before me to boldly stand when others wouldn’t. We should applaud men for standing but may we never do this work for the applause. Our engagement and work in this movement is driven by love for the image-bearer. That drive will see moms loved, babies saved, and abortion ended.
That’s why I do this work.