Thankfully this is a story that by God’s grace, is a direct answer to prayer. It is shared by me with permission from its owner, but her name and some details have been changed.
The first time I met ******, I had already had an idea that this could be a difficult task. I did not know all the details of her story, but within a few minutes I would hear them all. Tears streamed down her face the entire time as the gruesome details were shared. She had attended a college party where she was drinking. An unknown friend of a friend –who was sober–offered to drive her home and then they had sex. She couldn’t clearly remember the act, but did remember saying “no” and “stop”. And now she was pregnant. She was scared and she was sad because of this crime.
I wanted to cry too. In one night, this girl’s whole entire life had been turned upside down because of a manipulative act. How could I even know the right things to say? She went on to say that the father of the baby had already asked her about abortion, he would pay for it of course, and this would all be over. Not to mention, she had just moved to the city—hoping for a new start with school and a career ahead of her. Her family would be unhappy and disappointed. It was the wrong time and certainly the wrong circumstances. She felt the full weight of both her actions and the decisions to come.
I wanted to talk to her about God, but ****** brought him up before I had the chance, “I’m not very religious but I know I’ll give an account to God if I choose abortion,” She confessed. I was floored. Most people want to stay away from God as a holy and perfect judge and stick only to the vague, “God is love” and interpret it how they please. But if the Bible is true, and it is; then we must come to terms with its whole message. That God is holy and perfect, and that we are not because of our sin (Rom. 3:23), our sin has earned us just punishment from God (Rom. 6:23) but God lovingly makes a way for us to be made right with him through his Son, Jesus Christ (1 Pet 2:24); who never sinned and died the death we deserved. By faith and repentance (1 John 1:9, Ro 10:9) we can know God and be forgiven of all our sin and enter into a right relationship with God!
When ****** left that day, I felt very unsure of what she would ultimately do. Her circumstances were so hard! I prayed for her daily asking the Holy Spirit to help her circumstances and heart. She was also able to see an ultrasound of her baby and hear/see the baby’s heart beat in the next few weeks. She was able to see her baby move and turn and wiggle. I was able to hear more details about her and her life, love and accept her, and direct her to local resources. About a month later, I met with her for what I hope isn’t the last time. She had made her mind up! She would keep her baby!
Women like this are most certainly my heroes! I am so proud of ****** for choosing to do what is right despite her hard circumstances! She is a strong woman and capable woman. Here are a few things she had to say regarding her story below:
What would you say to other victims who find themselves pregnant?
That it is the hardest decision I had to make in my life, and although it’s very hard to make either decision would make a huge drastic impact on my life, and for me the guilt of taking my Childs life would be harder than her being a remembrance of what happened to me, the pain of knowing that I was violated will never go away, But the thought of taking a beating heart on top of that was too much to think of dealing with.
Do you regret your decision today?
I do not regret my decision to keep my daughter, because aside from how she was conceived she is mine and that will never change, and even though she has his DNA it doesn’t change the fact that she is my baby girl! And sometimes things are hard going through it alone, but I KNOW for a fact in my heart that she will change my life for the better.
What were the deciding factors that solidified your choice?
People are measured alive by their brain waves and by their heart beat, and at 6 weeks when you are able to have an abortion your child has both. Not that I am super religious but I was a victim of date rape, I don’t feel like I should have to explain to God why I took a Childs life!
By the way, this baby is a little girl and she is due in June!
May her story serve as an encouragement to other men and women everywhere.
If you or someone you know is a victim of date rape, the University of Louisville’s PEACC program has great resources and links of what to do next. You can read them here.